Or maybe I’m more like Bill S. Preston Esq, or Ted “Theodore” Logan, or both, two from one sent to the past to save their present and the future of earth and space.

Whoa! indeed.

Did you watch it? If not, you really should, otherwise this post is not going to make much sense because I don’t feel like recapping. But this is the internet and the video is ten minutes long, so maybe I should do a little recapping.

On second thought I am not going to. Watch the video.

Maddow’s claims may seem outrageous and overblown, but once the lawyers get involved (and you had better believe they are, politicians and rich people love lawyers) they become terrifying, plain and simple.
Birth control should not be banned for anyone and that is exactly what these types of bills will do. Well that, and send women’s rights straight back to the dark ages. How long would it take to strip women of their right to vote vote, after once again reducing them to nothing more than baby factories?

What Maddow should have pointed out was that if the bill in Mississippi, and others like it, become law the only form of birth control would be the condom and we all know how guys feel about them (or at least are supposed to feel about them, personally, I don’t hate or even mind condoms). But there is the women’s condom, and it seems to work like the male condom, that is it prevents sperm from going anywhere near an egg, unlike hormonal birth control. At least that is how I understand it, though admittedly I could be missing/misinterpreting something (but I really really don’t think I am. I would not bet my life on it, but I would bet my left pinkie toe). If you would like to know more about it, here you go.

So we all know that the knock against condoms is the loss of sensation. I can’t feel anything with a condom! is the oft heard cry from both sexes. Now just imagine if the only form of birth control available were condoms. Just think of all the feeling-less (see what I did there) sex you would be having, unless of course you were either willing to break the law by using hormonal birth control (Oh Christ is it just one big Big Pharma conspiracy? Think of all the money to be made on the contraceptive black market!) or risk getting pregnant.

I say Maddow should have made that point because it would be enough for all the men in the land to make sure this bill dies a long slow death.

Admittedly, I don’t have a good ear for music. I often think some songs sound like others only to have my friends tell me I am crazy. For example, compare these two songs, especially their intros and beat and tell me they don’t have more than a passing resemblance to each other. Song 1. Song 2. (It is entirely possible that I am wrong about the similarities between these two songs, as I wrote before, I do not have a good ear.)

Anyway, back to Radiohead and Sisters of Mercy. Earlier tonight I was listening to some tunes on mytunes and this song came on:
and the opening instantly reminded me of a song by Scott Tennorman’s favorite band.

Here is that song:

There is no doubt they sound different, but that is only because one has the volume turned to eleven and the other one is hanging out in the unobtrusive five-to-seven range. And sure, the lyrics of each song are completely different, but when I say the songs sound similar these are not the things of which I speak. What I am talking about is the basic beat and composition of the accompaniment, especially in the beginning of each song. Or maybe I’m crazy.

Let me know what you think in the comments.

Well, it turns out that he’s not the only Shark who can take stupid penalties and needs to stop.

On Thursday evening the Sharks played the Los Angeles Kings in what would ultimately be a losing effort after again blowing a lead.

The Sharks scored first, but not much later Ian White took a penalty which the Sharks were unable to kill. White’s penalty wasn’t necessarily stupid, but it was ill-timed.

Ryan Clowe then took two consecutive penalties, but luckily the Sharks were able to kill them. That didn’t stop the Kings from scoring during five on five play though and taking a 2-1 lead into the third.

In the third, with time running down, Patrick Marleau scored to tie the game with less than five minutes remaining in the game. Not long after, Joe Thornton took a very stupid penalty. Some might claim that the call was questionable, that Thornton just knocked a King to the ice, but did not trip him. That’s not what it looked like to me. In fact it looked like the Sharks captain and leading point scorer did in fact sweep the leg and deserved the penalty.

The Kings scored with about one minute forty second remaining and it looked all but over for the Sharks. However, Patrick Marleau would have something to say about that as he scored AGAIN to tie the game twice in the span of less than five minutes and with 3.4 seconds remaining in the third to send the game to overtime and eventually to the shootout where they would lose.

Kudos to Marleau for once again being a hero and giving the Sharks and opportunity to win. It’s a shame they didn’t. And big jeers to Clowe and Thornton (especially Thornton) for taking bad penalties and giving whatever momentum the Sharks had earned right back to the Kings. Mistakes happen (I mentioned that while blasting Heatley for his boneheaded penalties) but at this point in the season and beyond they need to not happen. Sure, Marelau did his best “Goonies never say die” impression and ultimately negated the effects of Thornton’s penalty, but if Thornton hadn’t taken that penalty Marleau still may have scored and the Sharks may have won the game in regulation rather than losing in a shootout. That’s a big maybe to be sure, but still a possibility, but regardless of whether or not Marleau still would have scored if Thornton hadn’t made that idiotic trip to the box, Joe and the Sharks in general have to play smarter.

I’m all for the dirty little play here and there (especially when you don’t get caught) but there is a time and place for that during the game. In the offensive zone with less than five minutes to go in the game and right after the team has tied the game is not that time nor that place. I hope the boys in teal can remember that come playoff time.

Go Sharks!

Well, two days before it opens on March 25th and there isn’t a single review on Rottentomatoes or aintitcoolnews, which can really only mean that it has not been sent to the critics. Usually when that happens it means that the movie is going to be trash.
Not that I need to read any reviews to know it’s going to be a waste of time and money.

I get that it’s supposed to be set in the mind of some girl and that she uses her fantasies to escape reality, but everything in the preview just looks fake–and I don’t mean the fact that these women imagine themselves as some kind of super commandos–I mean with the washed out color schemes, all those grays and blues that are so popular nowadays and make every movie look the same, the sparkly skin, and the explosions that are loud and pretty, but have no impact or sense of reality.

I do dig seeing Scot Glenn working again, but I don’t think even he can save this movie–after all he’s just the wise old man who tells them what they need to do. And Carla Gugino’s faux Russian/East bloc accent in the trailer is atrocious. She sounds like more of a caricature than Natasha from the old Bullwinkle cartoons.

Sadly, though, I am sure this movie will make tons of money, and in Hollywood, that’s all that matters, right?

Niklas Wallin got nailed into the boards from behind and was forced to leave the ice and eventually the game. There was no penalty called on the obviously illegal and dangerous play. There was also no retribution by the league’s offices after the game.

Dany Heatley, whom I have called out on this blog decrying his uncanny and super ability to take penalties at the worst possible moments in a hockey game, took another dumb penalty with just under five minutes left in the game. The Sharks were leading by one goal and Heatley threw his elbow into the face of a Star. Well, the penalty was called, as it should have been, and Heatley went to the box. Dallas pulled their goaltender to have a 6-4 advantage, but it wouldn’t help them as Joe Thornton got the puck, stick handled a bit, and hit the open goalmouth from behind the red line (or so I remember it, I was a bit drunk and it was almost 5am). The Sharks killed the rest of the penalty and went on to win the game 6-3. (After returning to play from the penalty box, Heatley netted himself and empty netter)

What else did he net? Well, a two game suspension for that idiotic headshot. I am glad he got suspended. He hasn’t been scoring so much this season, though he does seem to be working hard and he is taking shots, and he has become an on-ice liability when it comes to taking ill-timed and inopportune penalties. Mistakes happen, to be sure, and he’s the professional hockey player, not me, but he is there to score. And as I have written and said before, you cannot score from the penalty box. Simple as that.

The Sharks have already played out his suspension by defeating both Minnesota and St. Louis. It’s nice to know that we can score goals and win games without having to rely on Heatley’s offensive skills. At least for the time being. However, the playoffs are fast approaching (the Sharks now only have nine games remaining in the season) and the Sharks will need every able bodied player to step up and do what they are paid to do: blocking shots before they get to the net, stopping goals, scoring goals, in other words, make a positive impact on the game and give the Sharks a chance to bring Lord Stanley’s Cup to San Jose. I for one will not be holding my breath in anticipation of Heatley shaking off 82 games of bad habits and poor decision making miraculously for the playoffs, but I can hope, so I will.

And speaking of able bodied players who the Sharks will need to make drink deep from the cup of victory, Logan Couture, rookie sensation and playoff hero left last night’s game with some kind of leg injury. Hopefully it’s not serious as Cooch (so he is called, the poor guy) is the team’s second leading goal scorer behind Patrick Marleau, has carried the team through rough spots this year, and is a force to be reckoned with. The Sharks need Couture in the lineup for the playoff more than they need Heatley, or so it appears.

Of course, anything can change and this suspension could serve as a kind of wake up call to Heatley and illustrate to him the asininity of taking penalties in the final five minutes of a hockey game, especially one in which your club is trying to protect a lead–something they have not been super successful at this season.

So Couture, get well soon. I hope to see you streaking down the ice again in no time.

And Heatley, you’re on notice. Pull your head out of your poop-chute and start using it score goals and stay out of the penalty box.

Go Sharks!
Heatley, I’ve wr

Yes, that is a cheeseburger with donuts for the buns. It is called a Luther Burger and masters of the universe help me it looks kind of intriguing and I have a strange desire to try one. Sure, it looks disgusting and there is absolutely no way it has any redeeming nutritional value (except maybe the protein from the burger, but there are better, non-artery clogging ways to meet our daily dietary protein needs), but I would bet that it tastes surprisingly delicious. Salty and sweet tend to go together, and this burger appears to have both in spades, especially when bacon and cheese are added.

I don’t think I could eat a whole one though, whether or not I wanted to. One bite, just a taste of decadence would be more than enough for me and even then only to satiate the once in a blue moon cravings I get for something completely unhealthy and greasy and all around gross. It’s not that I eat super healthy all of the time, but for the most part I try to eat mostly right. I eat a lot of fruit and vegetables as well as nuts. Of course I also have those days where I’ll make this with twice the amount of sausage, but even then I try to accompany it with some kind of vegetable dish. I don;t eat a lot of candy or sweets but I have been known to crush a half liter of ice cream no problem. And I drink a lot of beer. The point is, I try to eat healthy and I usually do, but every once in a while the desire for something so outrageous and and vomit inducing takes hold in me and I think the Luther Burger would be an excellent choice to satisfy such cravings.

But since donuts and hamburgers are kind of hard to come by in the Czech Republic I don’t have to worry about actually trying one, and I bet by the time I return to the States and have a chance to taste this silent assassin I will have forgotten completely about it.

The game on Tuesday is guaranteed to feel like a playoff game. The Sharks need all the points they can get so that they can be assured of reaching the playoffs. The Wings want to show that they are still a force to be reckoned with as well as do whatever they can to solidify their 1st place in the Central Division and maybe even gain some ground on Western Conference leaders Vancouver–a prospect that seems unlikely but Detroit has always shown determination and fight and I don’t don’t that they will fight tooth and nail for all the points they can possibly get in an attempt to catch the Canucks.

Add to the fact that the game is the first of three on the Sharks last three or more game road trip-meaning the game will be played in Joe Louis Arena (a place where the Sharks have had marginal success if we want to be generous) and the game really should be a preview of what these teams will look like when the post season finally arrives. It will be interesting to see how Ian White and the rest of the Sharks respond to a team that will actually challenge them for 60 minutes and not just 40 like the Avalanche did on Saturday.

And Antti Niemi is probably going to have to have another excellent game if the Sharks hope to win because while Detroit’s goaltending might be questionable, their offensive prowess is not, and it seems that Howard (their goaltender) is regaining some consistency and is not the gaping hole in net that he was earlier this season. True, if HTML were living up to their offensive expectations and potentials, Niemi wouldn’t have to be spectacular, he would just have to be amazing, but the sad fact of the matter is that the Sharks’ top line is not producing the points this year meaning they have had to rely on secondary scoring much more.

Secondary scoring is essential to any team’s success, but when secondary scoring becomes your primary scoring (as it has been for the Sharks for the majority of this season) then there is trouble. Especially when going up against a team like Detroit which has scored 199 goals this season, good enough for second best in goal scoring in the entire league. Compare that to the 167 goals San Jose has scored while playing one more game than Detroit and it is clear that there is some reason for concern. The only possible silver lining is that the Sharks have allowed fewer goals than Detroit with 154 goals against compared to Detroit’s 169, but even this is misleading and not much of a silver lining, especially when one considers that the Sharks have had a terrible time holding a lead and have lost many one goal games either in regulation or in overtime/shootouts as a result of giving up an untimely tying/game winning goal, driving home the point that it does not matter so how much how many goals you allow, but rather when you allow them.

All in all it should be a most excellent game that I will have to try and stay up to watch. I’m glad school doesn’t start until Thursday. Go Sharks!

I was there last weekend, and it was lots of fun, but seriously, riding in cars over there was quite an interesting experience, and a bit stressful as well. Of course, it could also have something to do with the fact that I generally don’t like cars and I don’t drive… I did a lot of walking around Harpenden and St. Alban. I took a lot of pictures (some of which I will post here on the blog when and if I ever get round to it). I spent Saturday walking around London, singing this song:

(Okay, I didn’t really sing this song as my friends and I walked around, but the tune did cross my mind for a moment or two on several occasions during the day).

I also took lots of pictures of London. We went to Tower Bridge, St Paul’s Cathedral, Big Ben and the London Eye, the Millennium Bridge and some other places I’m sure, oh right, like Soho and London’s Chinatown. And here is a picture of yours truly that friend took.

All in all I had a great time and I didn’t want to leave. However, my desire to stay wasn’t born of some newfound love of England, but rather the rediscovery of what it is like to be immersed in and surrounded by English, even if it did sound all proper and funny to me. When I returned to Prague and saw all the signs in Czech and heard all the Czech around me I just wanted to hop back on the plane and go directly back to Luton, even if I had to sleep in the airport lounge and bathe in its restrooms.

That feeling has mostly passed, though I do miss being around my native tongue, and I am glad to be back in the Czech Republic. For how long remains yet to be seen, but anyone reading this will have an answer as soon as I do.