A while back I wrote a semi-review/reaction to “The Lovely Bones.” You can read it here, if you want.
Well, the other day someone left a comment on the post. Actually, he left three comments, the first one was posted at 7:41 am July, 4th, and the third one was posted at 7:43 am, July 4th. That’s right, he left three comments in three minutes, and it is awesome to see the progression of his anger because he is (or at least appears to be) extremely upset about my interpretation/viewing/review of the movie.
Here are the comments he left, in case you didn’t click on the link that took you to the post about the movie.
Comment number 1:
Nick wrote: You obviously have no good tastes in movies because this movie was brillant. I don’t cry in movies and this one almost brought a tear to my eye and thats saying something.
Comment number 2:
Nick wrote: You know how many young girls were probably put in similar situations in real life that the Salmon girl went through? I’m guessing quite a few so i find it disrespectful that you make a mockery of a deep movie such as Lovely Bones.
Comment number 3 (My personal favorite):
Nick wrote: Asshole
Now, I could not let these comments go without a response, but I did not want it to be an emotion filled response. This is the internet and people are going to write would be hurtful things (but just to be clear, I was not hurt or offended by any of his comments–I was entertained by them and found them to be quite recalculous) and I can deal with that. However, that does not mean I have to stoop to calling people names. I am more clever than that, so while my reply may be a tad sarcastic and over the top it is relatively free from name calling, and curse words.
Anyway, here is my reply to his comments, and no, I haven’t heard back from him since, and I kind of doubt that I will.
Oh Nick, you obviously have delicate sensibilities and I am sorry to have offended them. Really. I do, however, find it difficult to believe that you don’t cry during movies when you are obviously a very emotional person. I bet you cry every time some extra in a war movie dies as a result of collateral damage because you have nothing but the utmost respect for the millions and millions of innocents who have died as a result military action.
As far as my taste in movies is concerned, I could say the same to you because you liked a movie that I thought was a shit sandwich dipped into a pile of vomit and garnished with the carcass of an elephant who has been stripped of his ivory by poachers (oh no, am I being insensitive to elephants and their plight now?), but I won’t. Do you want to know why I won’t, Nick? because it is just your opinion that this movie was brilliant just as it is mine that it was a trite and boring piece of shit.
Thanks for reading, and I look forward to whatever wise and profound comment you decide to leave next.