On the Sharks and stupid penalties

Last post I wrote about how Dany Heatley needs to stop taking stupid penalties, especially near the end of games.

Well, it turns out that he’s not the only Shark who can take stupid penalties and needs to stop.

On Thursday evening the Sharks played the Los Angeles Kings in what would ultimately be a losing effort after again blowing a lead.

The Sharks scored first, but not much later Ian White took a penalty which the Sharks were unable to kill. White’s penalty wasn’t necessarily stupid, but it was ill-timed.

Ryan Clowe then took two consecutive penalties, but luckily the Sharks were able to kill them. That didn’t stop the Kings from scoring during five on five play though and taking a 2-1 lead into the third.

In the third, with time running down, Patrick Marleau scored to tie the game with less than five minutes remaining in the game. Not long after, Joe Thornton took a very stupid penalty. Some might claim that the call was questionable, that Thornton just knocked a King to the ice, but did not trip him. That’s not what it looked like to me. In fact it looked like the Sharks captain and leading point scorer did in fact sweep the leg and deserved the penalty.

The Kings scored with about one minute forty second remaining and it looked all but over for the Sharks. However, Patrick Marleau would have something to say about that as he scored AGAIN to tie the game twice in the span of less than five minutes and with 3.4 seconds remaining in the third to send the game to overtime and eventually to the shootout where they would lose.

Kudos to Marleau for once again being a hero and giving the Sharks and opportunity to win. It’s a shame they didn’t. And big jeers to Clowe and Thornton (especially Thornton) for taking bad penalties and giving whatever momentum the Sharks had earned right back to the Kings. Mistakes happen (I mentioned that while blasting Heatley for his boneheaded penalties) but at this point in the season and beyond they need to not happen. Sure, Marelau did his best “Goonies never say die” impression and ultimately negated the effects of Thornton’s penalty, but if Thornton hadn’t taken that penalty Marleau still may have scored and the Sharks may have won the game in regulation rather than losing in a shootout. That’s a big maybe to be sure, but still a possibility, but regardless of whether or not Marleau still would have scored if Thornton hadn’t made that idiotic trip to the box, Joe and the Sharks in general have to play smarter.

I’m all for the dirty little play here and there (especially when you don’t get caught) but there is a time and place for that during the game. In the offensive zone with less than five minutes to go in the game and right after the team has tied the game is not that time nor that place. I hope the boys in teal can remember that come playoff time.

Go Sharks!



You know how I know Sucker Punch is going to be a terrible movie, aside from the fact that it’s the brain child of that hack Zack Snyder (Watch the trailer and count how many slow motion scenes are shown, I counted at least five, but you know there will be more in the actual film?

Well, two days before it opens on March 25th and there isn’t a single review on Rottentomatoes or aintitcoolnews, which can really only mean that it has not been sent to the critics. Usually when that happens it means that the movie is going to be trash.
Not that I need to read any reviews to know it’s going to be a waste of time and money.

I get that it’s supposed to be set in the mind of some girl and that she uses her fantasies to escape reality, but everything in the preview just looks fake–and I don’t mean the fact that these women imagine themselves as some kind of super commandos–I mean with the washed out color schemes, all those grays and blues that are so popular nowadays and make every movie look the same, the sparkly skin, and the explosions that are loud and pretty, but have no impact or sense of reality.

I do dig seeing Scot Glenn working again, but I don’t think even he can save this movie–after all he’s just the wise old man who tells them what they need to do. And Carla Gugino’s faux Russian/East bloc accent in the trailer is atrocious. She sounds like more of a caricature than Natasha from the old Bullwinkle cartoons.

Sadly, though, I am sure this movie will make tons of money, and in Hollywood, that’s all that matters, right?

Thoughts on the Sharks

Last Tuesday, March 15, 2011 the Sharks played the Dallas Stars. During that game there was a lot of nastiness and hard hits from both sides. Douglas Murray the Swedish Murder Machine as I call him but is more commonly known as “Crankshaft” rocked the worlds of two opposition players on decidedly hard but clean hits.

Niklas Wallin got nailed into the boards from behind and was forced to leave the ice and eventually the game. There was no penalty called on the obviously illegal and dangerous play. There was also no retribution by the league’s offices after the game.

Dany Heatley, whom I have called out on this blog decrying his uncanny and super ability to take penalties at the worst possible moments in a hockey game, took another dumb penalty with just under five minutes left in the game. The Sharks were leading by one goal and Heatley threw his elbow into the face of a Star. Well, the penalty was called, as it should have been, and Heatley went to the box. Dallas pulled their goaltender to have a 6-4 advantage, but it wouldn’t help them as Joe Thornton got the puck, stick handled a bit, and hit the open goalmouth from behind the red line (or so I remember it, I was a bit drunk and it was almost 5am). The Sharks killed the rest of the penalty and went on to win the game 6-3. (After returning to play from the penalty box, Heatley netted himself and empty netter)

What else did he net? Well, a two game suspension for that idiotic headshot. I am glad he got suspended. He hasn’t been scoring so much this season, though he does seem to be working hard and he is taking shots, and he has become an on-ice liability when it comes to taking ill-timed and inopportune penalties. Mistakes happen, to be sure, and he’s the professional hockey player, not me, but he is there to score. And as I have written and said before, you cannot score from the penalty box. Simple as that.

The Sharks have already played out his suspension by defeating both Minnesota and St. Louis. It’s nice to know that we can score goals and win games without having to rely on Heatley’s offensive skills. At least for the time being. However, the playoffs are fast approaching (the Sharks now only have nine games remaining in the season) and the Sharks will need every able bodied player to step up and do what they are paid to do: blocking shots before they get to the net, stopping goals, scoring goals, in other words, make a positive impact on the game and give the Sharks a chance to bring Lord Stanley’s Cup to San Jose. I for one will not be holding my breath in anticipation of Heatley shaking off 82 games of bad habits and poor decision making miraculously for the playoffs, but I can hope, so I will.

And speaking of able bodied players who the Sharks will need to make drink deep from the cup of victory, Logan Couture, rookie sensation and playoff hero left last night’s game with some kind of leg injury. Hopefully it’s not serious as Cooch (so he is called, the poor guy) is the team’s second leading goal scorer behind Patrick Marleau, has carried the team through rough spots this year, and is a force to be reckoned with. The Sharks need Couture in the lineup for the playoff more than they need Heatley, or so it appears.

Of course, anything can change and this suspension could serve as a kind of wake up call to Heatley and illustrate to him the asininity of taking penalties in the final five minutes of a hockey game, especially one in which your club is trying to protect a lead–something they have not been super successful at this season.

So Couture, get well soon. I hope to see you streaking down the ice again in no time.

And Heatley, you’re on notice. Pull your head out of your poop-chute and start using it score goals and stay out of the penalty box.

Go Sharks!
Heatley, I’ve wr


While reading the game day thread for the Sharks versus the Predators over at Fear the Fin today (the Sharks won on an overtime goal by Marleau. YAY MARLEAU!!!!!!!!) I came across this picture.

Yes, that is a cheeseburger with donuts for the buns. It is called a Luther Burger and masters of the universe help me it looks kind of intriguing and I have a strange desire to try one. Sure, it looks disgusting and there is absolutely no way it has any redeeming nutritional value (except maybe the protein from the burger, but there are better, non-artery clogging ways to meet our daily dietary protein needs), but I would bet that it tastes surprisingly delicious. Salty and sweet tend to go together, and this burger appears to have both in spades, especially when bacon and cheese are added.

I don’t think I could eat a whole one though, whether or not I wanted to. One bite, just a taste of decadence would be more than enough for me and even then only to satiate the once in a blue moon cravings I get for something completely unhealthy and greasy and all around gross. It’s not that I eat super healthy all of the time, but for the most part I try to eat mostly right. I eat a lot of fruit and vegetables as well as nuts. Of course I also have those days where I’ll make this with twice the amount of sausage, but even then I try to accompany it with some kind of vegetable dish. I don;t eat a lot of candy or sweets but I have been known to crush a half liter of ice cream no problem. And I drink a lot of beer. The point is, I try to eat healthy and I usually do, but every once in a while the desire for something so outrageous and and vomit inducing takes hold in me and I think the Luther Burger would be an excellent choice to satisfy such cravings.

But since donuts and hamburgers are kind of hard to come by in the Czech Republic I don’t have to worry about actually trying one, and I bet by the time I return to the States and have a chance to taste this silent assassin I will have forgotten completely about it.